(704): Picky promise that on my wedding day you wont be prettier than me?

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(919): myroomsye mad eme do pre dpring braek shotssss (919) asw dagumnabitt whers a camrsa when ineedddd one

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(518): She wanted to give me head...I realized she was soo drunk that nothing good could come of it. So I said "Go ahead"

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(919): "dude all i remember last night was watching 2 hours of hannah montana and thought it was the greatest thing ever!"

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(919): She just touched my penis.

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(336): i'm sittin here drinkin x-rated and eatin italian toast and my kitty ears are moving with every chew haha i love u taylooor for ur italian toast ;) lets go to italyy!

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(910): This ani't a laughing matter innocent people's lives is at risk. the exotic mexican is holding people hostage at chucky cheese with a deadly virus strand disgusied as the rat.

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(919): Helping the NCSU men's soccer team win, sleeping with the opposing team the night before the game, one member at a time...

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(919): (919-1)sent- Got beer for the next two weeks. Had a few with my pizza rolls last night, and another when I had raman for lunch today. (919-2)recv- umm cool haha (919-1)sent- Fuck yea its cool. (919-2)recv- You are such a redneck (919-1)sent- Really? no I am not. (919-2)recv- You drink beer with raman... I win this argument.

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(919): you left three pieces packed up in your room. happy birthday to me

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(278): Snt* dude... Just had sex in the bouncy house in my garage*recvd*wtf... You have a bouncy house? *snt* not the point.*recvd* can i come and play pleaseeeeeeee MDT

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(763): I woke up with my shirt on as pants... (610) Oh god what did you do last night (763) I Lived

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(919): I've based all my standards off Spice Girls songs, I think I'll succeed at life.

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(919): It was a god damm undercover sting operation! RUN!!!

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Remember The Pics From Last Night?