(570): dude! just smoked a bong filled with mountain dew!! beat that bitch

Great Night (35) Bad Night (4) Comment (0) More texts from (570)

(814): the theory on 'everything-tastes-better-when-high' has much more supporting evidence than the existence of god

Great Night (41) Bad Night (9) Comment (2) More texts from (814)

(814): i went to Red Lobster, but couldn't afford the lobster

Great Night (1) Bad Night (21) Comment (0) More texts from (814)

(814): it should b a federal law; when a man watches desperate housewives with his girlfriend, a BJ is given to him within the next 3 hrs

Great Night (34) Bad Night (2) Comment (0) More texts from (814)

(814): since i have a relatively nice bod, i consider eating 3 double-cheeseburgers and 10 pcs of nuggets a personal achievement while high

Great Night (13) Bad Night (5) Comment (0) More texts from (814)

(570): You just haven't noticed i sparkle like Edward because i don't have obnoxious chimes follow me around.

Great Night (21) Bad Night (2) Comment (0) More texts from (570)

(484): Dude, I just drove through the ghetto and saw three guys sharing a joint and playing jenga with housebricks...one was a cop. Awesome Night...

Great Night (50) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (484)

(570): Remember when we hacked that grill to pieces with a stop sign up crystal

Great Night (10) Bad Night (1) Comment (0) More texts from (570)

(814): a fuckin bird pooped on my car right after i washed it... now im chasing it so i can poop in his nest

Great Night (35) Bad Night (8) Comment (0) More texts from (814)

(336): I learned when you sync your Facebook contacts to your phone, you suddenly have hundreds of numbers of people you don

Great Night (5) Bad Night (8) Comment (2) More texts from (336)

(814): Dude, do you think i can use saran wrap? i ran out of condoms

Great Night (2) Bad Night (28) Comment (1) More texts from (814)

(724): His parents named him after a pocahontas character... his life is going no where. (reply) except just around the riverbend...

Great Night (422) Bad Night (13) Comment (5) More texts from (724)

(570): The girl just told me she used a cucumber to "please" herself..how the FUCK am i suppose to compete with that?!

Great Night (67) Bad Night (317) Comment (7) More texts from (570)

(484): I woke up and there were bras on the ceiling fan and there were pants stretched over the toilet. There were bags of cheetos everywhere and root beer bottles in the bathtub. There were five people in the bed. What the fuck did I do last night and since when was I bisexual?

Great Night (47) Bad Night (8) Comment (0) More texts from (484)

Remember The Pics From Last Night?