(813): so your Uncle Benny totally ploughed my growler this morning. Thought you may want to know that.

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(813): It's a long story that involves a squeaky bra.

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(813): Don't get me wrong, I've already corrupted this sweet innocent previously sheltered freshman girl enough to sleep with me. But I'm putting that off until after the first week so she doesn't feel like as much if a whore.

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(813): were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.

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(813): Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?

Great Night (148) Bad Night (17) Comment (13) More texts from (813)

(813): he told me he wanted to finger me , im scared for my health.

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(813): she peed while i was in the middle of fucking her.

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(813): We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.

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(813): (rcvd) pow wow wow wow wow wow BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK (sent) go to fucking sleep you woke me up... (rcvd) four lokos wont let it happen sorrrry (: (sent) i rember when i was a kid and drank four lokos , man up and drink a beer (rcvd) ive had both , hey wanna add my friends dog on facebook? (sent) sure friend request me , but im only doing this because it will make you a happy drunk and you will laugh at this coversation tmrw (rcvd) im laughing now! (sent) you have incredible typing skills for being drunk (rcvd) i fucking knwo right! (sent) you just fucked it up..good night (rcvd) nonononononononno ANTHONY!!!!!! :(

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(813): Last night your mom asked why you only brought home black boys and you replied with "Mom, God put color in the world for a reason.."

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(813): I never thought finding my house that much of accomplishment until today!

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(813): right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming. (1-813): only on the fourth of july.

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(813): right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming. (1-813): only on the fourth of july.

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(813): I'm playing with boobs and texting you... that's how much I love you

Great Night (14) Bad Night (1) Comment (1) More texts from (813)

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