(816): I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.

Great Night (90) Bad Night (4) Comment (2) More texts from (816)

(816): Where'd you guys get the alcohol from? (1-816): Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower. (816): ...... wtf.

Great Night (27) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): you can get naked in front of my sister...but my mom...thats a different story

Great Night (12) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome

Great Night (105) Bad Night (15) Comment (2) More texts from (816)

(816): we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring

Great Night (136) Bad Night (18) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): sorry love. i didnt think our sex was awkward. sorry to bust your balls about it

Great Night (0) Bad Night (6) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): by the way we're now twins. just threw up in my sink

Great Night (1) Bad Night (4) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): so im watching this movie where these ppl are all the way makin it hardcore in the bathroom...made me think of you

Great Night (6) Bad Night (2) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.

Great Night (100) Bad Night (1) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.

Great Night (50) Bad Night (97) Comment (1) More texts from (816)

(816): She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?

Great Night (233) Bad Night (11) Comment (20) More texts from (816)

(816): So are you one of those people that give out free lap dances? (1-340)You know it~ (816) That is so cool.

Great Night (17) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): It's the big black woman with the giant tits I swear (1-340)How fucked up are you exactly? (816)I just confused a fish with a vagina. (1-340)Kudos~

Great Night (12) Bad Night (2) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

(816): 208DD623 if ya got a blackberry and r horny and wanna tlk to a sexy teen chick add me

Great Night (0) Bad Night (12) Comment (0) More texts from (816)

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