(916): I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...

Great Night (125) Bad Night (4) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): I went for a run tonight to the park on the other side of the neighborhood. Sold my friend a sack then ran back to my house. I got a workout and made money. Best first selling experience ever!

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(916): sent: i just gave my life to the lord! Re: does this mean no more lokos?! ):

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(916): Dude im telling you that you rape in MW when getting head :]

Great Night (4) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): (Sent) my kitty Kief ran away (Rcvd) Ugh im sorry fruit (Sent) It's okay. :[ just Kief is gone, im sad, im high, im hungry. life sucks.

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(916): Afroman, another blunt, and gorgeous guy. my life is complete.

Great Night (20) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): (Sent): Is everyone just on their periods right now? (Rec): Not. Not Sami. She's just a bitch.

Great Night (11) Bad Night (4) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): You said "I love you. I took 13 shots, each one for you." Then hung up.

Great Night (22) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.

Great Night (155) Bad Night (4) Comment (4) More texts from (916)

(916): dude,broken smirnoff bottles,broken toe,blood on the walls,and a punched out door u missed out

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(916): Momma always says "Nothin open that late 'cept legs and Waffle House"

Great Night (335) Bad Night (4) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): That's why I haven't been fucking too many bitches lately. Its hard to get return customers when I send them to the hospital

Great Night (19) Bad Night (5) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

(916): My brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.

Great Night (345) Bad Night (8) Comment (2) More texts from (916)

(916): I'm making special brownies. With my mom. Something is wrong with this picture.

Great Night (20) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (916)

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