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(147):
Text message goes here...I was pulled over tonight, and had been drinking heavily, and told the cop that I had crossed the line in order to miss a cat.................. he said to me" you saw it to" and let me go!!!! Probably stoned to!!!!!!
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(417):
I've got the hardest boner I've ever had any ideas
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(417)
(+61):
Matey... pit crunked but you arm the best and i home you come home,-? note: Sender is good male friend, I am male, I am not gay, not sure bout my friend now...
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(205):
May be drunk at the Senior Center on a Saturday @ whatever AM, talkin to old ladies about ya....
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(306):
The pizza delivery guy was about 90 years old and he talked like Donald Duck
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(306)
(207):
My mother forced me to take cold medicine this morning because i could not explain to her that my sore throat was from your penis and not germs -__-
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(207)
(651):
Not sure how it's possible, but Josh managed to puke on his ass last night.. He brings partying to a whole new level.
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(651)
(402):
(sent) Trent kicked Nick in the face lastnight (recieved) How did he get his foot that high ?
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(402)
(543):
(101) dude i don't even remember what happened last night. (102) we were kissing and t__ asked where his was, you stopped kissed him turned back and carried on kissing me. (101) i have reached a new level of drunk
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(543)
(640):
Sent-I'm fukkin going dragon hunting tomorrow and I'm gonna name them all! Rvd-cool... Sent-hell ya! It's gonna be sci-fi mixed w discovery channel but I gotta find my sword and blow torch! Wanna come w?!?! :D rvd- no but u can't borrow mine sent- score!
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(640)
(219):
Ugh I can't shower, it involves moving. (1-219)Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
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(219)
(219):
Ugh I can't shower, it involves moving. Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
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(219)
(3039):
Fff
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(3039)
(640):
That creepy man tried giving me his sucker that he already licked
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(640)
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